*The views expressed in the blog are those of the author.

In my considered opinion, there are three basic requirements for our children to become successful in life-excellent communication skills including command over spoken and written English language, general awareness (including that of the ever-evolving technology) and sound values. Let me talk about sound values that our children require for a well-rounded and cultivated personality. These values that encompass hard work, humility, simplicity and sincerity are required to be inculcated in children from the very beginning by parents. As per our traditional mindsets, while most of us invest in property, gold and policies to secure comfortable lives for our children, we do not pay requisite attention and side-line the more crucial requirement to imbibe essential values in children.

With all the contradictions existing in our society, specifically, when it comes to development, etc., the existing Indian family system with its strong stress on customs, celebrations and traditions has no parallels and our children need to be fully exposed to these in their formative years.

An individual who may or may not have wealth but has been well cared for within the protection of his family and acquaintances with good traditions in his childhood will rarely commit a crime.

Thus, to keep our ever-deteriorating social fabric intact in the younger generation which is being compelled to move at ‘jet-speeds’, it is imperative that first the parents at home and then teachers in school impart value education to our children. This needs to be done on priority.

A child whose childhood experience has been a pleasant one will be a balanced personality on becoming an adult. We as parents and teachers should bring-up children in a caring and loving environment. Some things that we ought to do immediately are as follows.

Give unconditional love to the child when they are young. It is only during childhood that you can spend maximum time with your children. As they grow into a teenager/adult, they will get very busy with their own lives.

Accept the child for what s/he is and not what we want her/him to be. Do not set unrealistic goals or ambitions for your child like do not force her/him to opt for study of science if s/he does not enjoy Mathematics. Do not desire from your child to do or become what you wanted but could not accomplish when you were young.

Always be consistent in your behaviour with your kids.

Do activities as much frequently as possible such as celebrations, outings, having meals together, watching a movie, etc as a family. This will help to keep communication lines open and your child will develop full faith in you.

Completely abstain from labelling your child as naughty/useless/clumsy, etc. If you do that, your child will take it for guaranteed that he is so and will put no efforts to change.

Never scold or shout at your child in the presence of outsiders, specially, in front of the peer group. If you do that your child will develop a low self-esteem/confidence and will eventually become an indecisive individual.

Never compare siblings and even your child with the neighbour/relative/friend’s child. Such a comparison, if negative will again lower the self-esteem of your child and develop hatred in her/him for the other sibling. If positive, your child will develop superiority complex, which is again not a healthy attribute. Instead, praise or censure your child as an individual identity.

Above all be a good role model for your child. Be well-mannered parents. Very often parents themselves are sarcastic, speak outright lies, fight on trivial issues and are rude in their behaviour towards their spouses and others. Remember, children will copy this very fast and start behaving in a similar fashion. They will start with you.

The above-mentioned tips are very simple to follow and will surely help you to establish a great parent-child relationship. Your child when s/he grows-up should proudly say that mine are the best parents.

-Dr LK Jain, Principal

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